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Exactly exactly just How should we interpret tales of dropping in deep love with some body of a gender that is surprising?

Exactly exactly just How should we interpret tales of dropping in deep love with some body of a gender that is surprising?

The technology of intimate fluidity

Just exactly just How should we interpret tales of dropping in deep love with some body of the astonishing sex? Tales such as this: i came across myself in unknown territory whenever I the open man, the “figured out” guy, the unquestionably right man noticed that I became in deep love with my friend that is best, a person. A person I’d recognized for seven years. A guy I experienced no time before even considered in a intimate means. But, here I became, in love.

One feasible explanation is the fact that the individual had been gay or bi or pan all along, and th ag ag e y simply didn’t know it. But some individuals report experiencing no past attraction to guys after which dropping in deep love with a guy, or feeling no past attraction to ladies then dropping in deep love with a female. Whenever an individual happens to themselves as homosexual, bi, or pan, usually in retrospect they are able to find attraction that is gay their past. This might be a kind that is different of.

Our assumption that is typical is the gendered facet of intimate attraction is fixed. If you should be interested in guys, this means you constantly had been, and you also constantly would be. But exactly what if intimate love is, in reality, fluid?

Lisa Diamond, a therapy researcher, includes a concept of attraction. Most of us come loaded with the machinery that is biological intimate love: the set bonding system that developed in animals. Some biologists think that the set bonding system evolved through the baby caregiver accessory system that bonds parents with their young and the other way around.